Pink & Blue

Women see pink, Men see Blue

Ephesians 5:22 , Wives submit yourself to your husband as to the Lord, Husbands love your wife as Christ Loveth the church...

What does this truly mean? Are wives supposed to just submit to everything and become doormats? What is God truly saying through this? Is it a command for women to submit to their husbands...or perphaphs a deeper call for intimacy between a husband and a wife, where they can grow on the areas they struggle the most.

My fiance and I had a lovely pre-martial counseling sessions today where we explored the meaning of this verse and I was greatly challenged by what we read. Ever since I can remember, I have always heard this verse used in the wrong context. I have sat through sermons where a male speaker stood on the pulpit pointing his finger at women ordering them to submit and obey their husbands cause God said so. It was a devastating thought for me that one day I would have to simply obey someone as if I was in some way "under" their authority. I didn't accept it. I have seen so many women become doormats and let their husbands have a power trip over having "authority" that I was not buying it for myself. 

This is one of those passages where I really struggled with and didn't know what approach to take to it. One of the best things about meditating on one verse is that you really get to explore and ask yourself important questions and doubts you may have. As we sat in one of our counseling sessions today I realized the importance of this verse. Have you ever thought about what comes naturally for men and women? In a recent study, men were asked what they wanted most: LOVE or RESPECT. Undoubtedly, most women would respond with Love. However, most men chose respect over love. Why? Does being male or female make us naturally hardwired to certain tendencies? When God commands for wives to respect their husbands, is it really an opportunity for women to practice something that is so hard for them to do naturally...an opportunity for growth? And vise versa, when God calls men to love their wives, is He really giving men an opportunity to grow in an area they struggle with?

Women think, feel, hear, see, and speak in PINK

It is in our nature, it is who we are. We think differently. We feel emotions differently.We have different perspectives. We filter our thoughts through a "Pink" Filter. We are more emotion based. It is who we are to naturally want to love and nurture everything around us.

Men think, feel, hear, see, and speak in BLUE

 Men filter their thoughts through a "Blue" Filter. It is in their nature to want to solve problems and be logical about things. Is in their nature to naturally show respect to others.

Understanding that God made us this way and that we are just different can help us better understand each other. When God calls us to love and respect one another, He simply does so because he wants us to grow. As Armando and I are exploring these areas of our lives, I have really been challenged by this. This is what it means to truly become "one flesh" with one another. To truly step out of your own comfort zone and your natural inclination and challenge yourself to become selfless for one another. Unfortunately, their are so many marriages and relationships where the wife doesn't respect her husband, which in turn makes him feel like not loving her, and it turns into a cycle that doesn't stop. Or another situation where the husband doesn't show love to his wife, which in turn causes her not to respect him.  It is so important for us to realize what areas of our lives we struggle with and what we can do to become selfless for one another and for God. Imagine a world where we all looked, thought, felt, spoke, and heard the same, no differences at all. Just thinking of that is kind of weird to me, I cannot imagine a place where everyone agreed 100% with everything I thought. 

Trying to understand how my fiance thinks, feels, and interprets situations helps me get to know him better everyday. It challenges me to be selfless, thinking of the other person before myself and It makes me realize that just because I see a situation in pink, doesn't mean he does too. It reminds me that sometimes I need to take off my "pink" glasses and put on his "blue" ones. :)